Change Agency from a Light Tower

“There is no loftier mission than to approach the Divinity nearer than other men and to disseminate the divine rays among mankind.”

Ludwig van Beethoven

What do we owe the world if we are healthy and happy? How do we feel in the presence of a joyful human being? What does a person who is not suffering need? I’ve been contemplating these questions in the time of the Coronavirus.

I remember living in Abu Dhabi during the Egyptian Revolution and the Arab Spring. At that time, I wrote a piece called, Losing the Middle East. It starts:

Forgive me, God- for I am writing this from the comfort of a five star hotel. While young men and women are battling each other for freedom on the streets of Cairo, I am taking a jog around a manicured Abu Dhabi, a safe haven while I toil with all that has become undone.

In the time of the Coronavirus, there are those who are sick and dying. Amen.

There are others who are fortunate and distancing. Some are outside protesting and dismantling unjust things. Others are waiting it out or stuck in survival-mode routines. And then, there are those who are healthy and happy and exercising agency from a light tower of their making. What does this mean?

It means that the world has changed and continues to change rapidly since the Arab Spring. Human beings are responding to change differently and each response is acceptable and worthy. More importantly, there is evidence to suggest that there is a growing number of people emerging, a new consciousness, if you will, moving toward a revolutionary activity I call Light Agency.

Lighthouse, Ríos, 2015

Light Agency is about letting go of fear and anything that makes us feel small, powerless, guilty and worried. It’s about choosing to live fully in the present moment and dedicating time to manifesting. It’s about revolutionizing the world by reviving the circuits within and then holding the live circuits open. It’s about sitting and basking in light, making a moment-by-moment commitment to focus on love, happiness and vitality. It’s about applying reiki to the world by paying attention to how you move your body through space-time for healing. It’s about infusing yourself with light because you know that nothing travels faster than the speed of light and you want to disseminate this feeling everywhere, to everybody, all the time.

Forgive me, Father—for I wanted to see the pyramids so badly! I had read about the energy, the power underneath! 
Forgive me, God— for today is Friday and from the comfort of my terrace, I see the white mosque over on the other side of the bay. It just floats out there as if it were being held magically over the water. And I am here with a fire in my heart.

Over the holiday, I sat with my sister holding her baby daughter who is a precious jewel. I observed the light bouncing off her eyes as they mirrored each other; it was the miracle of life and motherhood, infused with lightness of being, a sense of gratitude, peace and purpose. Delighted by this light, the curious teacher in me wondered: What can I say that will help my sister in this moment?

That’s when I fumbled and missed it.

I want to kneel down beside the barefoot men 
who are inside praying to you, our father.
But I choose to stay here and write.

What is Free Love?

Free love is an uncomplicated offering, compassion and peace, gentleness and caring. It is allowing the touch of another human being with great tenderness and joy for living.

Free love emanates from overflowing inner light. It is nuzzling your nose in the essence of all things, it is caressing, touching, digging into Mother earth, getting soiled with the nectar of living.

Free love has no obligation or expectation other than being yourself in front of another, revealing and seeing openly. Allowing presence to exist with care and curiosity. It is a moment of calmness and acceptance, keeping company, vulnerable and afraid are we, to sense that need of this lonely journey.

Free love is courageous honesty and small actions and deeds that scream authenticity and vivacity. The willingness to step out of routine, reach out and touch a person suffering, call out madness as we breathe, sit quietly or make love when we are alone and weary.

Free love is sharing and embodying love and kindness energy that is always overflowing from your own inner source of peace. The willingness to step out naked into society, letting others see you undisguised and unashamed. Unharmed by it all, although giddy.

Free love is giving up privacy and letting go of surface things but holding onto inner links.

Free love is showing up in the world innocent and foolish, owning your awkwardness, feeling your way through darkness, finding out that nothing more is needed other than your simple presence and first steps.

Free love is making yourself the ocean or the mountains, flowing and solid, always available, beautiful nature is yours, nothing is expected of you other than appearing. It is that moment togetherness brings.

Loving freely is the greatest expression of life and living.

Don’t be afraid, please.

Say Yes to Yourself, Then Others

“Living is not breathing. Breathing is only the possession of a possibility. Or of all possibilities.” Antonio Gala, La soledad sonora

You can find me on a solitary journey somewhere between the great metropolitan city and the coast, a long and winding highway that passes through perfectly distributed olive trees that dot the swooping orange and pale brown Jaén mountains; passing through the tunnel of honey, and discovering the oh so sweet Sierra Nevada valleys. I’m arriving briefly at some obscure town I’ll call heat and humidity and I know just then that I am winding down. Winding down this road and this scenery, this winding road inside me, and all I can think of is that, perhaps, it’s time to say, yes. Yes, to myself and then to others. What does this mean?

There is a time and place for meditation, traveling and solitude. And there is a time and place for relationship and establishing community. Learning when to say yes to yourself and when to say yes to others, learning when it’s time to come inside and connect, is not always easy. When we hide in meditation, when we rest in solitude for too long, or stay in our sameness– we are attached to the illusion that enlightenment can be found in one state or another and this is not the case. My sense is enlightenment is fluidity and accepting the ephemeral nature of all things. I am on that trip now, it’s enormous, this understanding. I want to cower in the darkness but light is already bursting out of me. This is the gift. Will I run away?

Say yes to the truth that we are born alone and we die alone, but don’t grow old and die before it’s time. Stay aboard your wandering ship; pursue that capricious gift even it means you must work in communion with others. I am comfortable in my aloneness or not, the world seems to pull me this way and that, and enlightenment is allowing the pull, accepting the struggle and opening myself to readiness, one way or another.

Say yes to the sea and unrest; to know when to hunker down in a storm. Say yes to seeing and touching that sacred moon; to recognizing an opportunity, that wayward passage forward. Say yes to yourself first, then embrace what you least expect. Say yes to yourself but answer the calling. Come down from your mountain and speak. Come out of your cave and greet the humility of people, for why are you here? Dance if there is music playing. Make love when you can. Open your hands wide, reap the reward of your journey.

Sit up with dignity, but then dare to bare your chest. Allow yourself to be small after such greatness, allow yourself to get wet. Let the struggle of uncertainty and breathlessness reside inside you, let the smell of strangeness enter your comfort; wander quietly into their hearts and homes and see how light is shared. Say yes, yes! Say yes to yourself first and then to others.

Throw down your anchor and yank at their chains. Allow yourself to be held in stillness, to observe the change. There is a beginning and an end to each display, so watch your ship approach the shore, watch how it collides and breaks apart as it nears the rocks. Stay the course without delay; don’t let time stand in your way. You are the captain of your ship and the waters are taking you somewhere. Let it take you.

Say yes to yourself and then to others. That is the way.